Thoughts of the Day

So, the last time that I wrote a post I deleted it about 20 minutes after clicking the publish button, because the last post was terrible. I was not in the mood to write anything more than complaints that belong to someone most of a decade younger than myself. I don't think anyone got the chance to read it, but if you did, I apologize.

What have I been up to lately? Well. I've started teaching myself Japanese. I've also bought myself some music in German and have been brushing up with that and some magazines and articles in German. It's been a lot of fun. I forget how much I love that beginning phase where I know only a handful of words and get so excited about improving that it's pretty much all I think about. This happened with Latin and German, and is happening now with Japanese.

I try to explain to others my love of both of these languages, but rarely do people understand. For example, most people find German to be a harsh language or that no matter what is being said, it sounds like the speaker is trying to prove a point. I disagree. German flows like no other language. It has a rhythm that just draws me in. Its similarities to English make it a little easier to learn that other languages and pronounces the guttural phonemes (i.e. the "ch" in "doch") really isn't that hard. My fascination of Japanese is mostly due my admiration and love of the culture and art that comes with it. I could talk about the reasons I love Japan, its people and its language (even though I've never been there) all day if you let me and even if you try to stop me, I'll try to keep going on. It's true. Try me.

... I do the same thing with art and art history. Just don't catch me in a talkative mood and you'll be safe. Probably.

Life. Stress. Sleep.

It's almost midnight and I feel like I should've been asleep an hour ago. Why am I not asleep? Because I'm still in denial that I have gotten used to going to bed before midnight.

So. Life.

One of my best friends came to visit me for a couple of days this week and it was great. I've really missed her. A lot of the people reading this know who she is, but I'm going to keep it in third person for the fun of it. Anyway.

I feel like I've forgotten how to socialize a little. Like I've spent so much time as a hermit lately that I don't know what it's like to have friends outside of Orlando. So, if you think I'm a little awkward, you should know that I'm well aware of it.

It's probably actually because I'm stressed, so I'm thinking a mile a second (because a minute really isn't that fast) and not always about what's going on around me at the time. I may be getting more gray hairs as this goes on... Ah, well. Such is life.

You may be wondering what I'm stressing about, but I'm not going to tell you. I really wish I could, but most of it is incredibly personal and I don't want the world to know what is going on. No, you don't need to be worried. Yes, I'll be okay. No, it's probably not what you're thinking it is unless I've talked about it with you directly. Which is highly unlikely. Let me keep my personal things to myself. 'Kay? 'Kay.

... That last bit seemed a bit mean... Sorry. I appreciate any and all concern, but I don't want to have to deal with answering people's questions right now. I am an introverted person. I like my privacy. I retreat to myself in order to recoup or solve my problems. I hope you can respect that.

So, now that that's done I'm just going to write whatever I want.

I've been thinking about transferring to FSU. Yes, because it's close to home. I have a long time to decide whether or not that's the right choice, but it will eventually be made. I loved living in Orlando and I miss the few people I've come to love down there, but I don't know how I feel about returning. I probably feel that way because I haven't finished what I moved back to Tallahassee to finish, yet. So if I were to go back to Orlando now, I would feel like a failure. The situation will change and my thoughts and feelings probably will as well.

My back just popped. It was glorious.

I'm tired. I'm going to give up writing now and crawl into bed.

Nighty-night.

Mostly Complaints

So you know that job that I thought I got? Turns out I didn't. Apparently I have some traffic violation that didn't clear up even though I know I took care of every ticket I've ever received. So now I have to get that cleared up before I can get a job. Awesome. Not bitter. At all.

So, in my free time I get to practice archery. Yep. And get some appointments out of the way, which is actually really good news and I am incredibly happy about that.

But yeah. Back to job hunting... Well. Sort of. I have to get this cleared up before I can even get a different job.

I wish I had more exciting things to talk about, but I don't. Sorry. Just needed to complain a little.

So here's another fantastic song I've recently found: